Breaking through myself

A day in Lent

On red band around handcrafted soap a friend gave me last Christmas is a quote from Marianne Williamson, “We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?  Actually who are you not to be?”

Today is one of the breakthrough days in a period of several breakthroughs.  I have really been challenging myself.  Though there were times I end up saying “I could have done better” even if what or how I did was already something, after all, every step taken even if it sometimes brings me backward is something to be glad about, something to celebrate.

The triumphs over myself are not solely nor mostly of my own effort.  Rather, these (whether I truly grasp this truth in all its magnificence or not) are by the grace of the Supreme Being.

I have just finished watching American Idol on TV and this batch of amazingly talented, true to themselves very young singers give me much to hope for and be inspired by–opening themselves to guidance by people who came before them, performing beyond the excellence they have already exhibited and continuing to reveal other dazzling facets of the gems that they are.

How can I slip back into doubting in or not being confident about my own talents?  How can I take long in developing these more and sharing what I could with my fellow human beings?

Each one of us here on earth has been given a set of these gifts.  And mine, what am I stalling for in further developing these, manifesting it more than I already have?  If I am awaiting praise and encouragement so I could go on, these have already been amply given time and time again.  What break do I still need to nudge me forward?

For quite some time, I notice a repetitiveness to the message I keep hearing from within.

This Lent, as outside there is a considerable lowering of noise levels (many people have left the metropolis) which I like to believe echoes that which is within me, I am paying more attention to signs and nudges telling me to clearly have a goal, write that objective, PLAN (once again), and ACT or, at least, just keep going, my dear.

I have made some notes.  Time to paint the big picture again complete with deadlines so I don’t get lost when new exciting things come along as they always do just when I am getting focused and rolling in the very thing my heart is set on.

I already know God loves me and if I truly believe in it, I can do and be anything my heart tells me to do and be.

Maya Angelou wrote

You said to lean on Your arm,

And I’m leaning.

You said to trust in Your love,

And I’m trusting.

You said to call on Your name,

And I’m calling.

I’m stepping out on Your word.